"A man can never have too much red wine, too many books, or too much ammunition."
- Rudyard Kipling
"Books give not wisdom where none was before. But where some is, there reading makes it more."
- John Harington, British writer and inventor of the flush toilet
"I think a good novel would be where a bunch of men on...
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"A man can never have too much red wine, too many books, or too much ammunition."
- Rudyard Kipling
"Books give not wisdom where none was before. But where some is, there reading makes it more."
- John Harington, British writer and inventor of the flush toilet
"I think a good novel would be where a bunch of men on a ship are looking for a whale. They look and look, but you know what? They never find him. And you know why they never find him? It doesn't say. The book leaves it up to you, the reader, to decide. Then, at the very end, there's a page you can lick and it tastes like Kool-Aid."
- Jack Handey
"Now, your stereotypical donut is nothing but dough and sugar fried in fat, am I right? Now that fat gums up your arteries and goes to your brain, and you turn liberal. And the next thing you know, Barry Manilow is on the turn-table and you're not going to work and you're voting for gun control. You see what I'm saying? You see the connection? That's why I eat granola."
- Sledge Hammer
"Whenever you read a good book, it's like the author is right there, in the room, talking to you, which is why I don't like to read good books."
- Jack Handey
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