Rhys Evans: I was lying in a ditch, it was dark, I sensed my colleagues around me as I could hear quiet movements and low talking, I had an ear piece in my ear, it crackled, commands came through, I couldn’t make them out, I was sweating too much, I looked at my watch, it was covered in mud, I couldn’t make the time out, I looked around, there was a heavy mist, it was raining, I was cold, yet I was sweating, I had a weapon in my hand that wasn’t my usual issued rifle, I felt around the weapon, I couldn’t make out what kind it was, I moved slowly to my left, I felt the ammunition pouches of another soldier, the pouches were soaking wet, I gave him a nudge, there was no reaction, I had a bad pain in my shoulder, I checked myself out, it was hard to see anything in the mist and the dark, I was very wet, I shook the ammunition pouches on the soldier next to me, there still was no reaction, I thought it could be our time for rest and he was fast asleep, I tried to remember who I was teamed with, I couldn’t, there was something in front of me, I tried to focus, everything was blurry, I started to think I might be wounded as I couldn’t see things properly, I stretched my hand out and felt a metal cup, it was warm, I grabbed the handle and pulled it to me, it smelled of coffee, the cup was very warm, I thought this is a good sign, I put the cup to my lips and smelt again, I took a sip, immediately I shivered, it was coffee but it had a good amount of alcohol in it too, I took another sip and lead there for a minute, and just waited, the ear piece in my ear crackled again, there was more talking coming through, it sounded like a foreign language, I didn’t understand what was being said, I started to look for the radio that should have been strapped to me, there wasn’t one, I took another sip from the cup, what I swallowed was cold and very salty, I felt sick and spat it out, I looked at the cup, there was some light from the moon, I looked at the cup, I could see what was in the bottom, it looked a dark red in colour and thick, I put my fingers inside and pulled them out, the red stuff from the cup was sticky, I smelt it and put my fingers to my lips and tasted it, it was salty, I dropped the cup, it was realised it was blood, I spat out again and checked my pouches for a water bottle, I found one and opened it and took a swig, what went into my mouth was warm and salty again, I spat it out, I felt dizzy and just laid there, I nudged the soldier next to me and called to him, there was no reaction, there was more light from the moon coming through the heavy mist, I was straining my eyes, someone moved to my front and sounded like they fell over, I went to grab my rifle, I couldn’t find it, I crawled to the person next to me and looked for his weapon, he was quite big, I pulled myself onto him, there was no weapon, I heard another movement to my front and rolled over the soldier who was next to me, I scrambled around trying to find anything to defend myself, there was nothing, I felt very wet and my shoulder still hurt, I found myself in a muddy water in a hole, I put my hands into it and threw a load in my face trying to make sense, my eyes stung, it wasn’t cold but sticky and warm, some went into my mouth, it was salty, I spat out again, and tried to move myself off this soldier who was next to me, I rolled over again, the ear piece in my ear crackled: “Delta four Alfa, send sitrep: (situation report) over” someone was asking what was going on, I didn’t recognise the call sign, I gave the soldier next to me a good shove, there was no reaction, I tried to find a mouth microphone, there wasn’t one, I tried to pull the ear piece from my ear, it was stuck, I put my hand to ear to grab It off, it was very sticky, I pulled it off and tried to find the cable from it, there wasn’t a cable, I heard another noise to my front, I looked and there was a dark figure in front of me, I scrambled and found something metal, I recognised it to be a bayonet, the figure that was to my front spoke a different language, he came forward, I saw him raise a weapon, I thrust the bayonet forward, there was a call of agony, I thrust again as quick as I could, the person fell forward and landed on me, he was very heavy, I could hardly move, I heard another voice shout: “Taff”! I tried to call back but the body on top of me was pushing me into the mud, I pushed real hard, I couldn’t move this weight off me, my face was in the mud, I couldn’t see a thing, there was an explosion to my front, followed by machine gun fire, I tried to move but couldn’t, everything as all sticky, I dug my feet into something and pushed hard, the body rolled off me, I gasped for air and scrambled to my feet, I fell over and landed by another body, I shook him, there was no reaction, the light was still bad and the mist was still heavy in the air, I searched around and found a weapon, I wasn’t sure what kind it was, I felt around and realised it was a Russian AK 47 machine gun, I was trained on this, there was a magazine on it, I took it out and checked it with my fingers, it was full of bullets, I put the magazine back in and cocked the rifle, another cri came out, “Taff”! Someone shouted! nothing made sense, I couldn’t see anything to my front because of the thick mist, I heard some voices to my left, It was coming from the dead soldier that I had killed, I knelt next to him and listened, he had a radio, I felt around and found his ear piece, the language was something I didn’t understand, an explosion went off, I dived for cover, bullets bounced off the floor next to me, I felt a strong pain in my leg, someone else shouted out, “we need covering fire Taff”! more machine gun fire rattled around me, I scrambled forward through the mud, I pulled myself forward and fell into a hole full of water, I tried to sort myself out as I was slipping around, everything was all sticky and warm again, I couldn’t see anything clear, a figure rushed in front of me and disappeared, there was another explosion, something fell into my lap, I grabbed at it, immediately I realised it was a grenade, I threw it away as fast as I could, a second later it went off, there was a cry of agony then nothing, I crawled my way to the top of the hole I was in and tried to look around, another grenade went off somewhere, and more cries were heard, there was a slumping sound in front of me, mud splashed into my face, I could hear a voice I recognised, “were fucked mate, our ambush was ambushed” a hand grabbed at my collar, I could see his face, I forced my eyes, I recognised someone who I really knew, “Moose! I called out, the body slumped next to me with no movement, I tried my best to get hold of him, more bullets raked the ground up around me, I was trying to clear my eyes, another grenade went off just over the other side of the hole I was in, another person fell over the top and down into the muddy water next to me, I pushed who I thought was Moose away and grabbed the new body and turned him over, his face was a mess with sticky blood and mud, his eyes opened, “that’s another fine mess you’ve got me into mate” he whispered, machine gun fire hit him several times in the back, he slumped on top of me, his blood was covering my face, I felt I was going to drowned in the mud with all this weight on top of me, the rain was getting heavier and the hole was filling up fast, another explosion went off, there was another scream, next instance another body fell in the hole with us, the weight was too much for me, I fought to push off the bodies on top of me, I was slipping in the mud, I was pushed under the water, I turned round somehow and pushed up as hard as I could with my legs, nothing moved, I slipped further under the muddy water, I was running out of breath my energy was running out, no way could I move the bodies off me, I was going to drowned, I could feel myself drifting away, my arm was stretched out and my hand was out of the water, one last grasp for life, someone grabbed my hand and started to pull real hard, I was drifting away, was it too late, my eyes were closing.I opened my eyes, I was wet with sweat, the room was dark, there was a girl leaning over me holding my hand, “Dean, Dean, you had a bad dream again, you’re ok, I’m here baby” she said and hugged me; I held onto her tightly, I wished these dreams would stop” I said.
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