Terry Pratchett's profoundly irreverent novels are consistent number one bestsellers in England, where they have garnered him a revered position in the halls of parody next to Mark Twain, Kurt Vonnegut, Douglas Adams, and Carl Hiaasen. The Color of Magic is Terry Pratchett's maiden voyage... read more
“I’m so scared of you my spine has turned to jelly, it’s just that I’m suffering from an overdose of terror right now. I mean, when I’ve got over that then I’ll have time to be decently frightened of you.”Rincewind
“If words had weight, a single sentence from Death would have anchored a ship.”
“It was all very well going on about pure logic and how the universe was ruled by logic and the harmony of numbers, but the plain fact of the matter was that the Disc was manifestly traversing space on the back of a giant turtle and the gods had a habit of going round to atheists' houses and smashing their windows.”
“Am I not a dryad? do you not know that what you belittle by the name tree is but the mere four-dimensional analogue of a whole multidimensional universe which -- no, I can see you do not.”Druellae
“'Gosh,' said Twoflower ineffectually, after a pause during which he had tried unsuccessfully to find a better word.”
“Being Ymon's right-hand man was like being flogged to death with scented bootlaces.”
“No, what he didn't like about heroes was that they were usually suicidally gloomy when sober and homicidally insane when drunk.”
It was all very well going on about pure logic and how the universe was ruled by logic and the harmony of numbers, but the plain fact of the matter was that the Disc was manifestly traversing space on the back of a giant turtle and the gods had a habit of going around to atheists’ houses and smashing their windows.Highlighted by 84 Kindle customers
Let’s just say that if complete and utter chaos were lightning, then he’d be the sort to stand on a hilltop in a thunderstorm wearing wet copper armor and shouting ‘All gods are bastards.’Highlighted by 76 Kindle customers
Some pirates achieved immortality by great deeds of cruelty or derring-do. Some achieved immortality by amassing great wealth. But the captain had long ago decided that he would, on the whole, prefer to achieve immortality by not dying.Highlighted by 74 Kindle customers
“I assure you the thought never even crossed my mind, Lord.” “Indeed? Then if I were you I’d sue my face for slander.”Highlighted by 59 Kindle customers
It is at this point that normal language gives up, and goes and has a drink.Highlighted by 44 Kindle customers
Picturesque meant—he decided after careful observation of the scenery that inspired Twoflower to use the word—that the landscape was horribly precipitous. Quaint, when used to describe the occasional village through which they passed, meant fever-ridden and tumbledown. Twoflower was a tourist, the first ever seen on the Discworld. Tourist, Rincewind had decided, meant “idiot.”Highlighted by 41 Kindle customers
He spent a great deal of time in similar situations, seeking gold or demons or distressed virgins and relieving them respectively of their owners, their lives and at least one cause of their distress.Highlighted by 32 Kindle customers
Only elves and trolls had survived the coming of Man to the Discworld; the elves because they were altogether too clever by half, and the trollen folk because they were at least as good as humans at being nasty, spiteful and greedy.Highlighted by 27 Kindle customers
Some might have taken him for a mere apprentice enchanter who had run away from his master out of defiance, boredom, fear and a lingering taste for heterosexuality.Highlighted by 27 Kindle customers
It is embarrassing to know that one is a god of a world that only exists because every improbability curve must have its far end; especially when one can peer into other dimensions at worlds whose Creators had more mechanical aptitude than imagination. No wonder, then, that the Disc gods spend more time in bickering than in omnicognizance.Highlighted by 26 Kindle customers
Followed by The Light Fantastic.
Followed by The Light Fantastic.
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