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Though her friends think Maggie has the perfect life, she's actually perfectly miserable.  The former Miss Alabama is worried about how her life has turned out--she's given up on her dream of living in a beautiful home like Crestview, and instead is a real estate agent in Birmingham. But just... read more

Summary edit see section history

Maggie Fortenberry is a 60 year-old former Miss Alabama who now works as a real eastate agent in an agency started by Hazel Whisenknott, perfect little pint-sized person who passed away. Maggie spends lots of time thinking about all of the things she's missing in her life and decides to end... read more (warning: may contain spoilers)

Maggie Fortenberry is a 60 year-old former Miss Alabama who now works as a real eastate agent in an agency started by Hazel Whisenknott, perfect little pint-sized person who passed away. Maggie spends lots of time thinking about all of the things she's missing in her life and decides to end it all. She goes to great lengths to plan her own suicide disguised as a disappearance. Eventually, circumstances arise, and she's forced to forego her plan for awhile. This gives her time to reconsider her plans before it's too late.

Characters/People edit see section history

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Quotes edit see section history

  • “Me? Wrong? Oh honey, I"m never wrong.”
    Hazel
  • “If you did tell the truth or if you didn't, there were always consequences. Human interaction was difficult at best.”
  • Popular Highlights from Kindle Customers
  • But time only moves forward and drags you along with it, whether you want to go or not.
    Highlighted by 100 Kindle customers
  • THEY SAY ENVY IS A COAL THAT COMES HOT AND HISSING STRAIGHT from hell.
    Highlighted by 71 Kindle customers
  • “There’s not enough darkness in the entire universe to snuff out the light of just one little candle.”
    Highlighted by 70 Kindle customers
  • “Good taste doesn’t cost a dime, but if you don’t have it, you can’t buy it for a million dollars,”
    Highlighted by 69 Kindle customers
  • If you did tell the truth or if you didn’t, there were always consequences. Human interaction was difficult at best.
    Highlighted by 43 Kindle customers
  • Oh sure, it would have been easier if she could have somehow unzipped her scalp, taken her brain out, and held it over the kitchen sink, and just rinsed away all the old regrets, hurts, and humiliations right down the drain, and started over, but that was impossible.
    Highlighted by 42 Kindle customers
  • THIRLED NO MORE. After the house had been furnished
    Highlighted by 33 Kindle customers
  • PEOPLE BRINGING TIDINGS OF JOY, KINDLY STEP BEHIND THOSE BEARING PRESENTS.
    Highlighted by 29 Kindle customers
  • THIRLED NO MORE. Thirled?
    Highlighted by 21 Kindle customers
  • Hazel had always said “Don’t give up before the miracle happens.”
    Highlighted by 4 Kindle customers
Show all 12 quotes from this book

First Sentence edit see section history

It's funny what a person will remember so many years later; what sticks in your mind and what doesn't.

Table of Contents edit see section history

Prologue: September 1955
Epigraph
The Big Decision: Monday, October 27, 2008
Something to Look Forward To
The Ice Cream Incident
Upon Further Reflection
The Lady with the Frozen Arm
Meanwhile, Back at Avon Terrace
So Rare: 1965
The Purple Flash: Monday, October 27, 2008, Midnight
The Beast
Sleepless in Mountain Brook
Hazel Whiskenknott Begins: September 21, 1929
Good Timing: Tuesday, October 29, 2008
Growing Up in Dreamland
Another New Day
The Perfect Plan
Magic City
The Open House
Another Unexpected Perk
Political Aspirations
What Had Possessed Her?
Meeting a Friend: 1990
Why Babs Hated Maggie
Making Arrangements: Wednesday, October 29, 2008
Dropping a Hint
What Was Bothering Brenda
Maggie's Rehearsal
The Beauty and the Beast: Thursday, October 30, 2008
Ethel is Aggravated
What Babs Had Done
T.G.I.F.: Friday, October 31, 2008
So Much Hope
Meanwhile, Back in New York
Audrey and the Panty Hose: Saturday, November 1, 2008
The Night-Before Preparations
Why Ethel Hated Babs
The Night of the Whirling Dervishes, Sunday, November 2, 2008
D-Day: Monday, November 3, 2008
Meeting Mrs. Dalton: Tuesday, November 4, 2008
Crestview Begins: Birmingham, Alabama, 1887
Congratulations All Around: Wednesday, November 5, 2008
The Big Caper
Another Big Puzzle: Thursday, November 6, 2008
A Crocker Family History
A Lost Object: Saturday, November 8, 2008
The Man on the Wall: Monday, November 10, 2008
Edward Crocker Begins: 1884
A Hard Sale: Mid-November 2008
Officially on the Market: November 23, 2008
Crestview: Birmingham, 1935
Time on Her Hands: Friday, November 28, 2008
Miss Edwina Crocker: London, England, 1920
The Humdrum Motel: Friday, December 5, 2008
A Bad Day: Tuesday, December 16, 2008
Brenda Reflects: Friday, December 19, 2008
Chicago, 1975
Another Side to the Story
Twas the Day before Christmas: Wednesday, December 24, 2008
Merry Christmas, Maggie: Thursday, December 25, 2008
Woman Scorned: Monday, December 29, 2008
Blast from the Past: Monday, January 19, 2009
Ready to Leave (Again): Saturday, January 31, 2009
Brenda Gets a Surprise: February 2009
The Kate Spade Affair: 8:57 A.M. March 15
It's Good to Have a Sister
Gus's Famous Hot Dogs: Early April 2009
Is It Real or Is It Memorex? April 12, 2009
Home for Good
More Revelations: Friday, April 24, 2009
What the Fly on the Wall Saw: Edinburgh, Scotland, May 22, 1884
Returning Home to Crestview: Scotland, 1946
Beauty Secrets: Friday, May 1, 2009
A Message from Mitzi: Friday, May 22, 2009
Certain Arrangements
Epilogue: A Few Years Later

Authors & Contributors edit see section history

  1. Fannie Flagg (Author)

First Edition edit see section history

Original Language: English
Publisher: Random House
Country: USA
Publication Date: 2010
ISBN: 1-4000-6593-3
Page Count: 336

Classification edit see section history

  • Library of Congress: PS3556.L26 I3
  • Dewey: 813

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