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Description edit
From a psychiatrist who has spent the past thirty years listening to other people’s most intimate secrets and troubles—an eloquent, incisive, and deeply perceptive book about the things we all share—and which every one of us grapples with as we strive to make the most of the life we have left.... read more
Ridiculously Simplified Synopsis edit
- - 30 real life lessons that nudge one towards accepting responsibility for one's actions & life. "We are what we do"
Summary edit
This is more likely to be found on the shelves with self-help books rather than novella but is a self-help book in a manner that it gives you a third angle to view things in our lives.
The book has 30 chapters, each one with a title indicating the lesson Gordon has derived from the real... read more
People edit
- Gordon Livingston: Livingston writes from life experiences and lessons he took out of those, which makes him the most important character in the book
First Sentence edit
Once, a long time ago, I was a young lieutenant in the 82nd Airbone Division, trying to orient myself on a field problem at Fort Bragg, North Carolina.
Table of Contents edit
Foreword by Elizabeth Edwards
1. If the Map Doesn't Agree with the Ground, the Map is Wrong
2. We Are What We Do
3. It Is Difficult to Remove by Logic an Idea Not Placed There by Logic in the First Place
4. The Statute of Limitations has Expired on Most of Our Childhood Traumas
5. Any Relationship is Under the Control of the Person Who Cares the Least
6. Feeling Follow Behavior
7. Be Bold, and Mighty Forces Will Come to You Aid
8. The Perfect is the Enemy of the Good
9. Life's Two Most Important Questions are "Why?" and "Why Not?" The Trick is Knowing Which One to Ask
10. Our Greatest Strengths Are Our Greatest Weakness
11. The Most Secure Prisons Are Those We Construct for Ourselves
12. The Problems of the Elderly Are Frequently Serious but Seldom Interesting
13. Happiness Is the Ultimate Risk
14. True Love is the Apple of Eden
15. Only Bad Things Happen Quickly
16. Not All Who Wander Are Lost
17. Unrequited Love is Painful but Not Romantic
18. There is Nothing More Pointless, or Common, Than Doing the Same Things and expecting Different Results
19. We Flee from the Truth in Vain
20. It's a Poor Idea to Lie to Oneself
21. We Are All Prone to the Myth of the Perfect Stranger
22. Love Is Never Lost, Not Even in Death
23. Nobody Likes to be Told What to Do
24. The Major Advantage of Illness Is That It Provides Relief From Responsibility
25. We Are Afraid of the Wrong Things
26. Parents Have a Limited Ability to Shape Children's Behavior, Except for the Worst
27. The Only Real Paradises Are Those We Have Lost'
28. Of All the Forms of Courage, the Ability to Laugh is the Most Profoundly Therapeutic
29. Mental Health Requires Freedom of Choice
30. Forgiveness is a Form of Letting Go, but they are Not the Same Thing
Authors & Contributors edit
- Gordon Livingston (Author)
Other Contributors:
- Elizabeth Edwards (Foreword)
First Edition edit
Original Language: English
Publisher: Marlowe & Co
Country: USA
Publication Date: 2004
ISBN: 1569244197
Page Count: 169
Publisher: Marlowe & Co
Country: USA
Publication Date: 2004
ISBN: 1569244197
Page Count: 169
Classification edit
- Library of Congress: BJ1581.2 .L58 2004
- Dewey: 158
Subjects edit
Links to Supplemental Material edit
- Book Review: In the opening essay in this paperback, Livingston suggests a manual be written of virtuous character traits that we can nurture in ourselves and discover in our friends and lovers. He suggests that the first one be kindness which he sees as "the most desirable of virtues." In another piece, Livingston observes that diminished respect and unmet expectations are usually present when marriages are in trouble. The author believes that happiness comes from taking risks, honoring our mortality, and being willing to be surprised.
- Book Review: In his book Dr. Gordon Livingston provides us with 30 essential truths. Actually 31 if you include the title. He writes from the premise that even though we can’t escape who we are or what has happened to us, we are still in control of who we would like to become and what we want to accomplish.
- Book Review: Through his involvement in the Vietnam War and its consequences, Gordon Livingston describes passionately and sincerely “the third puzzle room of life.” He does so from the perspective of a psychiatrist and a psychotherapist. He is also well acquainted with grief, managing to live through the pain of divorce and the death of two sons. Livingston brings to the work of psychotherapy and pastoral care an important approach which tends to be overshadowed by popular methods, whether Biblical or Pop-Psychological. He writes, “Therapy, properly done, is a combination of confessional, re-parenting, and mentoring.” Life is about change, and change can be for the better or the worse. Livingston strongly reminds us that change is a choice. The choice is often impeded by medication and systems which can perpetuate dependency.
- Book Review: Sometimes a short book full of homespun wisdom is just what the doctor ordered. I enjoyed this book with its 30 chapters of down-to-earth wisdom in easy-to-read, short chapters. Yes, you’ll recognize a lot of the “wisdom” in the book as good ‘ole common sense, but you know what? It’s rare to find a whole book that clearly lays out so many good nuggets of this kind of common sense — such as, “Nobody likes to be told what to do,” “We are afraid of the wrong things,” and “Happiness is the ultimate risk.”
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