This is beautifully written, realistic story about discovering relatively late in life the shocking truth about one's sexuality. The agony of discovery, the slow peeling away of the layers of denial, the ultimate choices these two women make -it all feels absolutely right. Certainly right for these two women. Wonderful characters, sizzling almost-sex scenes, not to mention the real thing. A real page turner. Loved it!

Although this book is described as a lesbian romance novel, there are too many physical interactions between women and men for this description to be accurate. Following a short synopsis of the story I've listed a couple of excerpts as examples.

Brenna Lanigan plays the leading role (commander) of a science fiction program currently running on television. She is on her second marriage and has two boys, 15 and 17. She's 40ish, beautiful and very good at her profession. Cassidy Hyland, 32, has been introduced as the newest castmember. She is divorced has a boyfriend, and a 5 year-old son. Cassidy is also beautiful, tall and lean; Brenna immediately labels her the "blonde bombshell," brought on the show specifically to infuse it with sexuality. Brenna was scared by Cassidy's physical beauty which turned into insecurity. For the first year, the only part that Cassidy saw of Brenna was a cold shoulder.

That all changes when Cassidy throws a birthday party for her 5 year-old in her home and intentionally invites her castmates, including Brenna, hoping to become a true member of the team. Reluctantly, Brenna attends the party and is surprised to see a more human side to her co-star. A friendship ensues and grows.
Meanwhile, Brenna and her husband (Kevin lives in Michigan, a fulltime councilman in the city where Brenna grew-up; Brenna and her two boys live in her home in Los Angles) have a serious falling out. Kevin under the pretense of a fundraiser for a children's cause, asks Brenna to attend a dinner with him and the night proves to be a ploy to gain him a political edge for his upcoming re-election. This cuts deeply into Brenna who has insisted on keeping her professional and personal lives separate. Weeks pass before they speak again.
Cassidy is frustrated with her boyfriend. As more time passes he continues his reluctance to do activities that include her son. His nights of taking her out for drinks and dancing become more distant as her schedule increases and she is exhausted every evening. The combination of all these forces coming together chip away at the seriousness of their relationship.

Cassidy and Brenna exchange several kisses (page 121) while on a weekend camping trip. However, once home, Brenna begins to recall the day she married Kevin, 15 months earlier: note,**, indicates reviewer speaking

**Greeting her four brothers, one of them, Scanlon, asks her (the wedding just a short few hours away)**
from page 150

"Happy?"
"Ecstatic," she answered.
**A few moments later when her husband-to-be, Kevin, walks in**
"Now, I'd rather she not be late to her wedding," he chided the group. "Out!"
**The conversation continues between them (Brenna and Kevin now alone)**
"Ellie has already declared your brother 'dreamy'," he revealed.
"Which one?" she asked throatily.
"Gary."
She laughed. "Don't tell him."
"It's just a crush," he said. His hands slipped around her back, and they indulged in a leisurely kiss.
"Not from her point of view, I'm sure." Brenna leaned back in the circle of his arms. "It's got nothing on the crush I've got on you," she murmured. His mouth pressed over hers, and she felt a quiver in her stomach. "Oh, why do we have to wait?" She felt cherished in his embrace.
"Then get dressed -- so we can get married, already."
Returning her focus to the present, Brenna inhaled and nodded ruefully. They had played tourist in the Bahamas for a week after the wedding, walking every morning and night in the blue-green surf, holding hands. Talking endlessly, they had dined by moonlight, and he held her tenderly, making love every moment between. END BOOK CITATION

**Brenna decides to work on her marriage and push thoughts of Cassidy out of her mind**

**WARNING: SEXUALLY EXPLICIT AND PROFANITY EXCERPT(S)**

Back on the set at the studio, Cassidy walks into her (now) old boyfriend's office:
page 153,
"Cameron?" She stepped forward, pushing in, and froze.
Cameron sat on his power-napping couch. A petite short-haired blonde had her head in his lap. Cassidy's face heated when she realized the woman's head was bobbing enthusiastically. Cameron's head lolled back on the cushions as his fingers moved through the woman's short hair.
"Cameron!"
The woman abruptly fell back onto the floor as he sat up, closed his zipper, and came to his feet. "What the hell do you want?"
Cassidy straightened. "God, Cameron, here?"
"What's it to you? You dropped me, remember?"
"You are really fucked up. You take Chapman's words as some sort of dare and change a script into a horrifying character assassination, which I have fixed by the way. Now...you're into underage girls?" END BOOK CITATION

**Brenna's husband decides at the last minute to join her and the kids for Thanksgiving, which was a few days away. On Thanksgiving Day, after picking him at the airport, they stop to see the holiday parade where Cassidy accidently bumps into the whole group. She too was at the parade with her son. Later in the evening after Brenna and her family have Thanksgiving dinner, Brenna and her husband retired to the swing in the backyard**

from page 164,

"Mom! Are you coming inside" Thomas' voice reached them easily.
Brenna looked up at Kevin and raised a questioning brow. He shrugged at her silent query. "If you'd rather..." he answered, leaving the option open-handed.
"I'll get cold fast now that the sun's gone," she reasoned.
"I wouldn't want a Popsicle in bed later." He chuckled. "We'll be there in a minute," he called to Thomas. "Let's go inside," he said softly, turning back to her and pulling her against him with subtle desire.
Brenna's heart tripped against her ribcage as his hands caressed her throat, brushing over her breast and onto her hip where he tugged, lifting her briefly onto his lap for a hard kiss.
On the pretext of becoming uncomfortably lightheaded, Brenna broke the kiss. "It's not late enough to send the boys to bed." Her voice was tremulous as she laid her palms against his chest. His eyes were searching hers, and she knew what he wanted. She was unsure she could give it to him.
Arguing against the old proscription, he coaxed. "They're old enough now. We can just go into your room..." His voice trailed off when he began nibbling her throat, humming against the skin the way he knew she liked.
It didn't bring a magic rush of desire, and she began to despair. However, his hands seemed to compel her. He's my husband, Brenna fretted, but she couldn't think very clearly. She felt like she was betraying someone, but could not decide if it was Kevin...or Cassidy. What she did know was that her heart was not in this.
She closed her eyes, and Cassidy's face floated easily into her mind: cool blue eyes filled with a warming fire, the dimple in her chin that begged to be touched. As Kevin continued kissing her, Brenna seized on the warm desire her imagination was causing and the heat it was sending to her loins. She drew in a long breath. "All right." Shaky, Brenna found herself set on her feet. Kevin led the way back inside.

**Nothing is described in detail and the next you read about what happened is on page 166**

Kevin rolled onto his back, taking Brenna with him. Their bodies were covered in a fine sheen of sweat, and the sheet stuck. He laughed, clearly pleased, and kissed her repeatedly. Brenna turned her head aside, pretending to want to curl down and fall asleep. Kevin whispered how wonderful she was.

All the while, Brenna was emotionally distraught at what she had done. Oh my God! I just gave my husband a sympathy fuck. Her face hot, but not from exertion, Brenna shut her eyes tightly and fisted her hand against Kevin's chest. As soon as she felt him fall asleep, she would leave the bed.
...
Her chest hurt from withholding the tears -- wanting to cry out in passion, but finding that nothing he did moved her. The usually pleasant soreness between her legs felt instead like a violation of her soul. She needed to slip away and wash herself. END BOOK CITATION

I thoroughly enjoyed this book. It was well written with great character development. The reader gets drawn in to the women's relationship and cannot help but root for them to find happiness with each other and in their lives. This is a must read!

This is one novel you must read. The story of two straight "living" people who had to make some very difficult decisions. There were constant twists and turns and it definetly held my attention throughout the book. I plan to immediately order her first nove Coloring Outside the Lines. The story is very believable. Excellent read and one that I would revisit.

I'll give this one a solid 3 stars, but it still falls towards the upper levels of that rating. Part of me felt that the book was a touch too dry or unemotional in its prose, but a part of me was fascinated by the detail in which the psyches of each of the main characters was delved into, unflinchingly. Circumstances would simultaneously seem somewhat contrived, and provide enormous illumination into the motivations of the characters involved.

I enjoyed the careful, thoughtful way the relationships were developed in this book, not just between the two main characters, but their families and friends as well. I like characters who spend time in their heads, but these characters sometimes approached the realm of being too "head heavy" to me. Again, though, as the thought crossed my mind to be annoyed, the story would rescue itself. I do have a personal hang-up about unfaithful spouses that made the reading a bit uncomfortable for me. I fall in to the trap where I want my characters to be the best they can be, and thus get distressed when they let themselves and those around them down, but ultimately it worked for me given the setting, the build up, and the motivations.

I was wary about the setting. It seems like a lot of authors throw settings into the Hollywood realm in order to have an easily manipulated back-drop, stressors and ready-made drama, and are either too enamored with the setting, or make it too generic, but this book avoided those pitfalls for me. It was interesting to have the cast interactions, and how the plots of various episodes would resonate with different aspects of their lives. It was a clear plot device, and yet never made a nuisance of itself in my opinion.

This is a very solid book with moments of brilliance, and an enjoyable read for me. I think some of the development could have been foregone in order to spend more time on the emotion and details of the wrap-up, but these are minor quibbles. The editing was fairly solid, and the writing was splendid in its character study.