Artemis is at boarding school in Ireland when he suddenly receives an urgent video e-mail from Russia. In it is a plea from his father, who has been kidnapped by the Russian Mafia. As Artemis rushes to his rescue, he is stopped by Captain Holly Short of the Leprecon fairy police. But this... read more
The book starts with a preface from Jerbal Argon, indicating that the book is a report on Artemis Fowl II's behavior, commissioned by the Lower Elements Police. The preface provides some background information, as well as, the motives behind Artemis Fowl II's actions in the last and current... read more (warning: may contain spoilers)
The book starts with a preface from Jerbal Argon, indicating that the book is a report on Artemis Fowl II's behavior, commissioned by the Lower Elements Police. The preface provides some background information, as well as, the motives behind Artemis Fowl II's actions in the last and current book.
After a quick flashback to the kidnapping of Artemis I, the book has Artemis Fowl II undergoing a largely unsuccessful counseling session at the fictional Saint Bartleby's School for Young Gentlemen. (It is mentioned that Artemis had already retired several counselors.) It is interrupted when Butler calls, informing Artemis that a MPEG-1 movie file containing footage of the missing Artemis Fowl I had been emailed to him and that the Russian Mafia were likely responsible. A rescue operation immediately commences.
Meanwhile, the Lower Elements Police are investigating a B'wa Kell smuggling operation. Artemis Fowl II is the primary suspect for supplier of the contraband, so Captain Holly Short is sent to detain him for questioning. When Fowl and Butler are proven innocent, Commander Julius Root strikes a deal with Artemis: If they help him find the smugglers' supplier, he and Holly would aid in Artemis Fowl I's rescue.
The third-person narration switches back and forth constantly, allowing the reader to understand more of what is going on. Opal Koboi and Briar Cudgeon are revealed to be the masterminds of the smuggling operation, with the mesmerized Luc Carrère supplying the contraband.
After Butler succeeds in taking out Carrère, with Artemis's side of the deal done, they proceed on to the rescue mission. Foaly manages to trace the spiked email to Mikhael Vassikin, an ex-KGB agent now working for the Mafia in Lenin Prospekt, Russia. Short, Root, Butler, and Artemis immediately begin the operation.
The rescue group is then ambushed by a goblin hit squad, and the group shelters beneath an overhang. Butler realizes it was a trap, so he pushes Holly and Artemis out just before the overhang collapses. Butler is knocked unconcious, but Commander Root is okay. Then Holly tells Root to fire out a piton, so Holly can attach the piton to something to pull Butler and Root out. Then, Holly spies a train (which Artemis reveals to be a radioactive train) and they jump on it. They succeed in pulling Root and Butler out, but a crack in the tracks makes the train jerk. It causes Holly to lose a finger, which is later healed magically after an improvised Ritual involving a contraband acorn. Also mentioned is a statement from Artemis which Holly interpreted as sincerity, rare for Artemis, and another sign of his continual mental change throughout the series. At the same time, Briar Cudgeon ambushes and locks Foaly in the Operations Booth while the rescuers escape from the goblins. Foaly manages to use Artemis's laptop to send him a text message (in SMS language) telling him about the revolution going on underground.
The revolution had started around the time Foaly had been trapped, leading the fairy Council to think that Foaly was behind the revolution. In Foaly's text message, information that had already been shown to the reader are again revealed, including that all weapons and communications are controlled by Opal Koboi.
Artemis decides to take over Koboi Laboratories and return all weapons to the LEP, interrupting the rescue mission. Holly reveals that Foaly had a hunch that Mulch Diggums, the criminal and kleptomaniac dwarf that had been presumed dead after the Fowl Manor siege, was still alive and in Los Angeles. As he had broken into Koboi Laboratories before, they go to apprehend him once again.
Mulch Diggums was indeed in Los Angeles. Using the money stolen from the Fowl Manor siege, he had bought a penthouse apartment in Beverly Hills. The book documents his theft of several Oscars before being apprehended in his apartment by the rescuers.
They then break into Koboi Laboratories through a hollow titanium foundation rod. Artemis manages to turn both the goblins and Koboi against Cudgeon by playing messages pre-recorded by Foaly. Cudgeon is killed when he is thrown into the open DNA cannon plasma feed (activated seconds before by himself), which simultaneously blacks out Opal Koboi. The restored power activates DNA cannons in Police Plaza, neutralizing all goblins there. The rescuers then immediately head toward Murmansk to rescue Artemis Fowl I. Foaly is still trapped in the Operations Booth, as the LEP outside, commanded by Captain Trouble Kelp, still thinks he is to blame for the revolt.
The rescuers then go to Murmansk to rescue Artemis Fowl I. It goes well, although Artemis Fowl I was dumped into the water, complicating things; he is successfully retrieved. The kidnappers are lured away with a flare attached to a briefcase supposedly containing the money. The money was mentioned to be fairy-counterfeit, high enough quality to fool all but the most professional examination--and designed to dissolve after seventy-two hours. Given oft-mentioned ruthlessness of the kidnappers' boss, it is likely they met their employer's wrath over the disappearing money.
The story then ends there, with a dual epilogue. The first deals with the return of the Artemis Fowl II and Artemis Fowl I to Fowl Manor and Helsinki, respectively. Directly before, Artemis thanks Holly. Holly also takes a gold coin, shoots a hole in it, and lets Artemis catch it as a thank you for the successful re-attachment of her trigger-finger, as well as to remind Artemis that "deep beneath the layers of deviousness, you have a spark of decency". The moment was described as "the first cool moment of Artemis' young life". The second epilogue has Artemis back in a counseling session with Dr. Po. This time, when asked whether he had "found anyone worthy of your respect", thinking of his father, Holly, and Butler, he answered yes, further showing his continual change from bad to good (a central theme of both the book and the entire series).
“'But, Julius,' protested Foaly. 'That's grunt work.'Root took a step closer. 'One, don't call me Julius, civilian. And two, I'd say it was more like donkey work.'”Foaly, Commander Root
“If you listen really hard you can just about make out the sound of nobody giving a hoot.”Holly
“She conscious?” asked the commander. Koboi’s eyes flickered open. Holly shut them with a swift rabbit punch to the forehead. “Nope,” she said innocently. “Out cold.”Highlighted by 94 Kindle customers
Mulch had drawn another diagram. This one looked like a bendy snake. “We’re being led by an idiot with a crayon,” said Root, with deceptive calmness.Highlighted by 83 Kindle customers
There were only two men on the planet better educated in the various martial arts than Butler, and he was related to one of them. The other lived on an island in the South China Sea, and spent his days meditating and beating up palm trees. You really had to feel sorry for the B’wa Kell.Highlighted by 76 Kindle customers
Foaly bristled. “At the risk of sounding clichéd, Briar, you’ll never get away with this.”Highlighted by 70 Kindle customers
There was something morbidly fascinating about flying into an uncharted tunnel at a reckless speed, with only a kleptomaniac dwarf’s word for what lay at the other end.Highlighted by 66 Kindle customers
“I could tell you, but you’re not going to like it.” “Tell me, Captain. That’s a direct order.” Holly told him. He didn’t like it.Highlighted by 62 Kindle customers
Then, strangely, he calmed down. In fact, he seemed almost happy. Those who were close to the commander knew that when he was happy, somebody else was about to be extremely sad.Highlighted by 62 Kindle customers
At least he spent some time outdoors, and got to meet some new people. It’s a pity most of them were trying to kill him.Highlighted by 61 Kindle customers
The commander loved quoting The Wizard of Oz. Three of his cousins were in the movie.Highlighted by 61 Kindle customers
“Hmm,” said Root, his face glowing redder than a baboon’s behind.Highlighted by 57 Kindle customers
Artemis Fowl: A Psychological Assessment
CHAPTER 1: Family Ties
CHAPTER 2: Cruisin' for Chix
CHAPTER 3: Going Underground
CHAPTER 4: Fowl Is Fair
CHAPTER 5: Daddys Girl
CHAPTER 6: Photo Opportunity
CHAPTER 7: Joining the Dots
CHAPTER 8: To Russia with Gloves
CHAPTER 9: No Safe Haven
CHAPTER 10: Trouble and Strife
CHAPTER 11: Mulch Ado About Nothing
CHAPTER 12: The Boys Are Back
CHAPTER 13: Into the Breach
CHAPTER 14: Father's Day
An Epilogue or Two
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