The Ankh-Morpork Post Office is running like . . . well, not at all like a government office. The mail is delivered promptly; meetings start and end on time; five out of six letters relegated to the Blind Letter Office ultimately wend their way to the correct addresses. Postmaster General... read more
“The Royal Bank of Ankh Morpork was the ugliest building NOT to have won any architectural awards.”Narrator
“Shame, Ignominy and Mr Fusspot (the dog) were staring him in the face, but only of them was licking it.”Moist Von Lipwig
“Mr Lipwig, do I need a badge that says tyrant?”Vetinari
take care, when you are closely observing, that you are not closely observed.Highlighted by 48 Kindle customers
a weapon you held and didn’t know how to use belonged to your enemy.Highlighted by 47 Kindle customers
“Why are you always in such a hurry, Mr. Lipwig?” “Because people don’t like change. But make the change happen fast enough and you go from one type of normal to another.”Highlighted by 44 Kindle customers
THERE WERE MEETINGS. There were always meetings. And they were dull, which is part of the reason they were meetings. Dull likes company.Highlighted by 42 Kindle customers
“I’m an Igor, thur. We don’t athk quethtionth.” “Really? Why not?” “I don’t know, thur. I didn’t athk.”Highlighted by 36 Kindle customers
The price of a good woman was proverbially above rubies, so a skillfully bad one was worth presumably a lot more.Highlighted by 36 Kindle customers
Students, eh? Love ’em or hate ’em, you’re not allowed to hit ’em with a shovel.Highlighted by 31 Kindle customers
Igor beamed. At last. All this politeness had been getting on his nerves. What an Igor expected was insane orders. That was what an Igor was born (and, to some extent, made) for. A shouted order to do something of dubious morality with an unpredictable outcome? Thweeet!Highlighted by 26 Kindle customers
“That is a very graphic analogy which aids understanding wonderfully while being, strictly speaking, wrong in every possible way,” said Ponder.Highlighted by 25 Kindle customers
“No, I think he likes a little opposition.” “And are you any good at knowing how much?” “No, that’s what I enjoy. You get a wonderful view from the point of no return.”Highlighted by 16 Kindle customers
Author's Note
1. Chapter 1
2. Chapter 2
3. Chapter 3
4. Chapter 4
5. Chapter 5
6. Chapter 6
7. Chapter 7
8. Chapter 8
9. Chapter 9
10. Chapter 10
11. Chapter 11
12. Chapter 12
13. Chapter 13
Epilogue
Preceded by Wintersmith, and followed by Unseen Academicals.
Preceded by Going Postal.
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