Most women would love to live as royalty, but Betsy has found that being vampire queen has more problems than perks, except for always being awake for Midnight Madness sales. It may be easy to find blood (yuck) in the dark of night, but try finding a strawberry smoothie. And employees at her... read more
“Get out of my house, you rotten undead things!" "She did the exact same thing when the Boy Scouts came around selling Christmas wreaths”Antonia / Betsy
“My Queen, I always liked you personally, but now I am filled with admiration because you're not psychotic after being raised by that woman." "It's true," Sinclair said. "It's a miracle you're not more vain, shallow, and ignorant." "Thanks," I said. Then, "What?”Tina / Sinclair / Betsy
“What's amazing is that she was possessed by Satan for almost a year and nobody noticed anything unusual!”Betsy (referring to Antonia)
“Where is your spirit of adventure?" "It wore off during World War Two.”Betsy / Tina
“With love’s light wings did I o’erperch these walls, For stony limits cannot hold love out, And what love can do, that dares love attempt.”Highlighted by 6 Kindle customers
I guess this sounds kind of shallow, but it’s harder to be depressed when you put yourself together as best you can. To put it another way, my life might be in the toilet again, but with my hair combed, my eye shadow coordinated, and my bra matching my underpants, I was ready for whatever the world threw at me.Highlighted by 6 Kindle customers
What’s amazing is that she was possessed by Satan for almost a year and nobody noticed anything unusual!”Highlighted by 3 Kindle customers
Prologue 1: Secrets
Prologue 2: Problems
Chapters 1-35
Preceded by Undead and Unemployed, and followed by Undead and Unreturnable.
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