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Are you and your spouse speaking the same language? While love is a many splendored thing, it is sometimes a very confusing thing, too. And as people come in all varieties, shapes, and sizes, so do their choices of personal expressions of love. But more often than not, the giver and the... read more

Ridiculously Simplified Synopsis edit see section history

  • - Residents of Mars and Venus learn how to communicate.
  • - Psycho-babble breaking down the individual's neuroses in relationships
  • - Learn to speak the right love language and be heard.

Summary edit see section history

Unhappiness in marriage often has a simple root cause: we speak different love languages, believes Dr. Gary Chapman. While working as a marriage counselor for more than 30 years, he identified five love languages: Words of Affirmation, Quality Time, Receiving Gifts, Acts of Service, and... read more

Unhappiness in marriage often has a simple root cause: we speak different love languages, believes Dr. Gary Chapman. While working as a marriage counselor for more than 30 years, he identified five love languages: Words of Affirmation, Quality Time, Receiving Gifts, Acts of Service, and Physical Touch. In a friendly, often humorous style, he unpacks each one. Some husbands or wives may crave focused attention; another needs regular praise. Gifts are highly important to one spouse, while another sees fixing a leaky faucet, ironing a shirt, or cooking a meal as filling their "love tank." Some partners might find physical touch makes them feel valued: holding hands, giving back rubs, and sexual contact. Chapman illustrates each love language with real-life examples from his counseling practice.

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Quotes edit see section history

  • “Poor choices in the past don't mean that we must make them in the future. Instead we can say, "I'm sorry. I know I have hurt you, but I would like to make the future different. I would like to love you in your language. I would like to meet your needs."”
  • “The desire for romantic love in marriage is deeply rooted in our psychological makeup. Books abound on the subject. Television and radio talk shows deal with it. The Internet is so full of advice. So are our parents and friends. Keeping love alive in our marriages is serious business.”
  • Popular Highlights from Kindle Customers
  • Our most basic emotional need is not to fall in love but to be genuinely loved by another, to know a love that grows out of reason and choice, not instinct. I need to be loved by someone who chooses to love me, who sees in me something worth loving.
    Highlighted by 3204 Kindle customers
  • Forgiveness is not a feeling; it is a commitment. It is a choice to show mercy, not to hold the offense up against the offender. Forgiveness is an expression of love.
    Highlighted by 2775 Kindle customers
  • People tend to criticize their spouse most loudly in the area where they themselves have the deepest emotional need.
    Highlighted by 2402 Kindle customers
  • I am amazed by how many individuals mess up every new day with yesterday. They insist on bringing into today the failures of yesterday and in so doing, they pollute a potentially wonderful day.
    Highlighted by 2254 Kindle customers
  • The best thing we can do with the failures of the past is to let them be history.
    Highlighted by 2005 Kindle customers
  • Love is the attitude that says, “I am married to you, and I choose to look out for your interests.”
    Highlighted by 1905 Kindle customers
  • The essential ingredients in a quality activity are: (1) at least one of you wants to do it, (2) the other is willing to do it, and (3) both of you know why you are doing it—to express love by being together.
    Highlighted by 1890 Kindle customers
  • Love makes requests, not demands. When I demand things from my spouse, I become a parent and she the child.
    Highlighted by 1505 Kindle customers
  • “Inside every child is an ‘emotional tank’ waiting to be filled with love. When a child really feels loved, he will develop normally, but when the love tank is empty, the child will misbehave. Much of the misbehavior of children is motivated by the cravings of an empty ‘love tank.’”
    Highlighted by 1267 Kindle customers
  • Psychologist William James said that possibly the deepest human need is the need to feel appreciated.
    Highlighted by 1259 Kindle customers
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Setting & Locations edit see section history

First Sentence edit see section history

At 30,000 feet, somewhere between Buffalo and Dallas, he put his magazine in his seat pocket, turned in my direction, and asked, "What kind of work do you do?"

Table of Contents edit see section history

Acknowledgments

1. What Happens to Love After the Wedding?
2. Keeping the Love Tank Full
3. Falling in Love
4. Love Language #1: Words of Affirmation
5. Love Language #2: Quality Time
6. Love Language #3: Receiving Gifts
7. Love Language #4: Acts of Service
8. Love Language #5: Physical Touch
9. Discovering YOUR Primary Love Language
10. Love Is a Choice
11. Love Makes the Difference
12. Loving the Unlovely
13. Children and Love Languages
14. A Personal Word

Study Guide

Glossary edit see section history

  • Love Tank: The author frequently uses this term as an analogy for the love all humans need in order to function. An empty "love tank" is not a good thing.

Series & Lists edit see section history

This is book 4 of 10 in New York Times Bestsellers - Paperback Advice (Current). (authoritative list)
This book is in Love Languages. (community list)

Authors & Contributors edit see section history

  1. Gary Chapman (Author)

First Edition edit see section history

Original Language: English
Publisher: Moody Pr
Country: Add the country of publication.
Publication Date: 1992
ISBN: N/A
Page Count: 204

Classification edit see section history

  • Library of Congress: HQ734 .C466 1992
  • Dewey: 646.78

Links to Supplemental Material edit see section history

More Books Like This edit see section history

   
  • The Five Love Languages of Children
  • The Five Love Languages, Men's Edition
  • The Five Love Languages for Singles
  • The Five Love Languages of Teenagers
  • The Five Languages of Apology
  • Love & Respect
  • The Four Seasons of Marriage
  • Desperate Marriages: Moving Toward Hope and Healing in Your Relationship
  • Hope For The Separated: Wounded Marriages Can Be Healed (Chapman, Gary)
  • Now You're Speaking My Language: Honest Communication and Deeper Intimacy for a Stronger Marriage
  • The Five Languages of Apology
  • God Speaks Your Love Language: How to Feel and Reflect God's Love
  • Love as a Way of Life: 7 Traits That Will Transform Your Relationships
  • The One Year Love Language Minute Devotional (One Year Signature Line)
  • The Other Side of Love: Handling Anger in a Godly Way
  • When Sinners Say "I Do"
  • What Did You Expect?
  • Love That Lasts
  • This Momentary Marriage
  • Sex, Romance And The Glory Of God
  • Sacred Marriage

Books Cited by This Book edit see section history

   
  • The Bible (New International Version)

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